Posted by Colin Turner on August 21, 2003 at 00:00:49 from 195.92.67.65 user colinturner.
In Reply to: Re: Death and Glories posted by Dan Lind on August 20, 2003 at 00:45:44:
The BBC introduced me to the word “turmut” in the 1950s through the excellent schools broadcasts which they put out every day. The head teacher of our two-room village school in South Devon (an exile from Cumberland who read AR’s novels to us at the end of each afternoon) ensured our music entitlement by tuning in every Monday to “Singing Together” and on Thursdays to the rather less appealing “Rhythm and Melody”.
I think I was about 7 when the presenter of “Singing Together”, William Appleby (?) invited us to join in a song called Turmut Hoeing. We followed the words and music from the BBC booklets (one each if we were lucky) and I remember being fascinated by the look and sound of the text – possibly the first time I had encountered dialect words in print.
Turmut Hoeing
' Twere on a jolly zummer's day, the twenty-fust o' May,
Giles Scroggins took his turmut-hoe, wi' thic he trudged away:
"Now zome volks they likes haymakin', and some they vancies mowin'-
But of all the jobs as I likes best, gi'e I the turmut-hoein'."
Chorus
The vly, the vly,
The vly be on the turmut-
' Tis all me eye
Fer I to try
To keep vly off the turmut.
"The fust place as I went to work, it were wi' Varmer Gower:
Who vowed and swore as how I were a fust-rate turmut-hoer;
The second place I went to work, they paid I by the job -
But if I'd knowed a little 'afore, I'd sooner a' bin in quod."
Chorus
The vly, the vly,
The vly be on the turmut -
' Tis all me eye
Fer I to try
To keep vly off the turmut.
The last place as I went to work, they sent for I a-mowin',
I sent word back, I'd sooner take the zack, than gi'e up turmut-hoein'!
Now all you jolly varmer chaps wot bides at home so warm -
I'll now conclude my ditty wi' a-wishing you no harm."
Chorus
The vly, the vly,
The vly be on the turmut –
' Tis all me eye
Fer I to try
To keep vly off the turmut.
My friends and I were so tickled by the words that we would bellow them aloud in the playground though, later on, I came to regard it as one of those “cod” folk songs that the comedian Kenneth Williams parodied in the guise of “Rambling Sid Rumpo”.
So, when I read the word “turmot” in Big Six (the head, Blanche Mather, didn’t get as far as the Broads stories) it didn’t strike me as odd or unusual. If I thought about it at all I guess I regarded it as a term of mild abuse, implying that Rob was a gormless “turnip-head” with nothing between his ears, rather like Nancy’s use of “galoot”.
While searching the net for the words of “Turmut Hoeing” – the melody is out there, too - I came across a reference which implied that the song had been recorded on a shellac 78, along with a similarly bucolic song called “Buttercup Joe”. If this is correct, the word “turmut” could have been launched into much wider circulation than its rural origin would suggest.
“Turnip” is one of those words which sounds more attractive when mispronounced - “sparrow-grass” for “asparagus”, “waps” for “wasps” and so-on – and I guess AR would have been delighted to have the opportunity to use it.
Horticultural note: There are many suggested methods for controlling Turnip Beetle when they make those alarming holes in the leaves of young brassicas but this one is supposed to be simple and effective. Grease a sheet of cardboard, plywood, or similar with Vaseline and walk down the row holding the tilted board in front of you a few centimetres from the tops of the plants. The beetles will be disturbed by your approach, jump into the air, and stick to the grease.